emotion

Not Hiding My Shadows to Allow the Miracle

Not Hiding My Shadows to Allow the Miracle

Not Hiding My Shadows to Allow the Miracle

When I allowed myself to get still, I started to get in touch with how vast my self-hatred was. I had never realized how unhappy I felt nor had I realized how addicted I was to feel bad. It was as if my joy and happiness were not a priority. I really thought I wanted to love, but my life showed me all of the resistance I had.

I was tired of having to judge who I could give love to and trust and who I had to avoid. Every time I created that distance from whomever or whatever I was judging, I felt much more distant from my own heart and more distant from my own joy. It was as if I had a wide mosaic of enemies surrounding me, constantly on-guard in case any of those voracious and unscrupulous beasts would steal my well-being. I was a victim of my own beliefs, ideas, and interpretations.

As I started to become

The Joys of December

The Joys of December

The month of December for me has always been a symbol of celebration. Growing up, I always looked forward to this time of the year. I recently asked myself, “What about this month is so special and appealing to me?” My memories around this time of the year were always fun with family and close friends. It just felt so good to feel the constant presence of joy in my heart!

Why didn’t I feel that same joy in all the other months of the year?